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| -rw-r--r-- | src/app.php | 130 |
1 files changed, 129 insertions, 1 deletions
diff --git a/src/app.php b/src/app.php index 0a10ec6..b80083d 100644 --- a/src/app.php +++ b/src/app.php @@ -7,4 +7,132 @@ * @author Phil Burton <phil@d3r.com> */ -echo "dump\n"; +$poos = [ + "Taking the Brown's to the Super Bowl", + "Dropping the kids off at the swimming pool", + "Dropping a deuce", + "Busting a grumpy", + "Glassing the surface", + "Cuttin' rope", + "Pinch off a loaf", + "Make an offering to the porcelain throne", + "Pushing a mess", + "Building a log cabin", + "Make underwater sculptures", + "Unload some timber", + "Make like Snoop and 'Drop it like it's hot'", + "Need to void", + "Make a deposit in the porcelain bank", + "Use the big, white telephone", + "Feed the French", + "Unloose the caboose", + "Drop the property value", + "Plant a tree", + "Play dough factory", + "I've got to see a man about a horse", + "I've got to see a man about a wallaby", + "Growing a monkey tail", + "Murder a brown snake", + "Drive out the prairie dogs", + "Drown a baby otter", + "Gotta feed some bears", + "A brown dog scratching at the back door", + "Leave some gorilla fingers", + "Liberate the brown trout", + "Let the dogs out", + "Let the turtles loose", + "Laying some wolf bait", + "Slop some bum slugs", + "Sending a fax", + "Purge the council", + "Call my agent", + "Download some software", + "Getting something down on paper", + "Take care of some paperwork", + "Captain's log", + "Releasing the Kraken", + "Drop anchor", + "Drop some depth charges", + "Lay undersea cable", + "Insert a Navy Seal team", + "Deploying the USS Brownfish", + "Negotiate the release of some chocolate hostages", + "Churn the dookey butter", + "Drop some potatoes in the crock pot", + "Off to see the chocolate gobbler", + "Craft a fudge pop", + "Drop a swamp pie", + "Drop a grande grumpy", + "Anal puking", + "Assquake", + "Building a log cabin", + "Coiling some rope", + "Freeing the turtles", + "Growing a tail", + "Analyzing a log dump", + "Backing the trailer in", + "Baking a loaf", + "Baking some brownies", + "Baptising ______ [racial epithet]", + "Becoming one with the animal kingdom", + "Being anal-nonretentive", + "Big brown man knocking on the back door", + "Blowing mud", + "Bombing the Oval Office", + "Bunghole train has left the station", + "Lip-smacking names for doing a poo", + "Chopping a log", + "Coiling a steamernames for poo", + "Cooking a brown carrot", + "Cooking a butt burrito", + "Cooking up a pot of anal stew", + "Crimping off a length", + "Curling some pipe", + "Dirty birth", + "Downloading some brownware", + "Drilling for mud bunnies", + "Dropping a chocolate cobra", + "Dropping the kids off at the pool", + "Drowning the kittens", + "Exporting a cigar to Cuba", + "Filling the peanut butter jar", + "Full moon over troubled waters", + "Giving a [ethnic slur] a burial at sea", + "Greeting Mr Hankey", + "Grinding the beef", + "Moar names for doing a jobby", + "Hatching a new boss", + "Honking out a dirt snake", + "Launching a rectal rocket", + "Meeting the bald man with the cigar", + "Floating a corn canoe", + "Laying some brown carpet", + "Letting my people go", + "Letting the dog out", + "Making a deposit at the porcelain bank", + "Making a grunt sculpture", + "Making a Minnesota hand warmer", + "Making butt gravy", + "Making haggis", + "Making some trouser chilicrap the book", + "Microwaving a dachshund", + "Negotiating the release of the chocolate hostages", + "Offloading some freight", + "Painting the bowl", + "Paving the Hershey highway", + "Paying the plumber", + "Planting a steaming bouquet of brown roses", + "Pinching the head off a [ethnic slur]", + "Poking the turtle’s head out", + "Polluting the pond", + "Praying to Buddha", + "Backing the big brown caddy out of the garage", + "Putting fruit in the bowl", + "Releasing the hounds", + "Removing a butt tampon", + "Squeezing out a Hershey’s Kiss", + "Stocking the lake with brown trout", + "Unfurling a poopdedoop", +]; + +echo $poos[rand(0, count($poos))] . PHP_EOL; |